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Demands

When Sylvia was a couple months old, there was a day that I really don’t want to forget. One of those Crazy Days. Actually, there are two crazy days I don’t want to forget, but I already wrote up one of them here.

Sometimes Sylvia gets really unhappy.  It just happens.  One day when she was a couple months old, she was really unhappy, and I couldn’t find anything to do to help her find a place of calm.  Finally I took her outside.  It was still quite cold, so I wrapped her up in a blanket, and we sat on the front steps.  The sky and trees and air all seemed to help.  Her crying lessened.

Meanwhile, Andrew was really wanting my attention.  He was watching a movie, and he wanted me to watch it with him.  It didn’t matter to him if Sylvia cried through it.  It was most important that my eyes be fixed to the television.  So when I took Sylvia outside, he was worried.  He paused the DVD (something he had recently learned how to do), and he sat on the chair by the front window.

After gesturing to me that I needed to watch the TV, he would set the show playing again.  But he was watching me and not the show.  As soon as my attention wandered to my crying baby, he’d pause it, gesture wildly, and then re-start when I looked up at the television.

So I was sitting out on the porch (with no coat) on a cold day trying to watch a movie through the window while soothing my sad baby.  I remember thinking at the time that it all felt rather surreal.  Lots of demands!

Ahh, those first weeks and months of having a new little person in our lives.  How long ago it feels!  How amazing and wonderful it was.  I smile thinking of all the families in the future who will start and grow their families.  Such a lovely thing it is.  Even when it’s crazy.

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Frankenstein Monday

So.  Monday wasn’t a great day.  Sylvia has been sick (runny nose, feeling cruddy) and she was a bit, er, ahhh, owley.

The following interchange from Young Frankenstein (one of my very favorite movies ever) kinda sums it up.  In this scene, Frankenstein is about to go into a room with The Monster, who they have just discovered is violent and unmanageable:

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Love is the only thing that can save this poor creature, and I am going to convince him that he is loved even at the cost of my own life.
No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for.
Do you understand? Do not open this door.
Inga: Yes, Doctor.
Igor: Nice working with ya.
[Dr. Frederick Frankenstein goes into the room with The Monster. The Monster wakes up]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. What’s the matter with you people? I was joking! Don’t you know a joke when you hear one? HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here! Open this goddamn door or I’ll kick your rotten heads in! Mommy!

Ahhh, just reading that gives me a good chuckle.  I was unable to find a clip of this exchange online, but I did find a good Young Frankenstein in 5 minutes clip that was really marvelous.

In other news, my darling daughter is quite improved today.  Still runny at the nose, but her mood is back in the manageable realm.  Makes for a much nicer day!

Brother Michael, I hope you enjoy this post.  Writing made me think of you:)

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Real tigers

The weekend before Thanksgiving, we spent an lovely afternoon at the Henry Vilas Zoo.  Happily, we ran into some friends there!  And we saw the tiger.  The amazing, slightly horrifyingly huge tiger.

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Caden, Andrew, and the tiger

So beautiful!  So close!  Run kids!!!  Wait, don’t run.  Hold very still.  Think non-prey thoughts.

I am a tree.  I am a rock.  I’m some nice, boring dirt.

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Sylvia was entranced.

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The tiger visit here prompted the face painting that I posted pictures from earlier.  It’s great to be able to take on the role of the mighty beasts you saw at the zoo!

IMG_9191 Continue reading “Real tigers”

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Tigers!

My kids love face paint!  Here’s a set of pictures of them after a recent face-painting session.  Next time, Andrew says they will be pirates.  Painted patches, painted beards and scars.  Sylvia will be adorable with a little gotee…

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You may notice that Sylvia is wearing Andrew’s shirt in these pictures.  She wears his clothes a great deal of the time.

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Yesterday, in fact, she was wearing at least three of his shirts and two pairs of his pants.  At the same time.

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She really loves her brother.

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He loves her too:)

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Beware ye who enter our abode.  There may be wild creatures lurking about!

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Softly going crazy

Monday was a bit of a crazy day in my house.  It’s all faded into the past now, but I thought I should write it down so I don’t forget how ridiculous things can get sometimes…

On Monday mornings, Andrew goes to preschool, and Sylvia and I come home and clean the house.  This week, I really went all out.  After vacuuming, dusting, washing the windows, cleaning the bathroom, mopping the kitchen, emptying the litter boxes, and doing four loads of laundry, I was pooped.  I’d also been up past 1am the night before working on a photo order.

And then, Sylvia decided not to take her afternoon nap.  So by 3pm, the kids were both a little grouchy, I was out of gas, and thence we began our downward spiral.

Sylvia likes going potty on the toilet.  She sometimes is very opinionated about not wearing diapers.  On Monday, that was the case in spades.  She pulled off diapers faster than I could put them on her.  And then she kept peeing on the floor.

We’d get some rags, and she would help me clean it up.  Not a big deal – we have hardwood floors – but annoying, especially because hours before the house was so clean.  Then she peed on my cashmere blanket.

We tussled, the diaper went on, the diaper came off, and then she came and got me again, “Uh oh, Mommy.”

She’d peed on two couch cushions (Where was all this pee coming from??  Did she drink the bathtub??)

I kind of blew my lid.  It was like the Rath of Khan.  (At least in my brain.)

My first thought was to haul the couch out to the curb.  Seriously.  Just trash the whole thing.  Then I spoke sternly enough to Sylvia (and perhaps it was the crazed look that had come into my eye) that she submitted to a diaper and kept in on the remainder of the evening.

I washed the couch cushions, and I sat down.  Bryan was out for the evening, and it was dinner time.  I gave the kids cereal and apples with peanut butter.  At bedtime, Andrew asked politely for supper.  I told him we’d already had it.  He informed me that that was a snack, not supper.  Too bad, kiddo, Mama was losing her marbles, and what you get in that situation is cereal.

Ahh, fun times, fun times.  Sweet memories…

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Maretta and Kyle’s new diggs

My sister, Maretta, and her husband, Kyle have had a bit of a housing adventure this past year.

Last summer, they moved into a house with a couple of friends.  They soon started having troubles with their landlord.  He didn’t fix things (oh, like the hole in the living room wall).  Then a couple months ago, they learned that he was getting foreclosed upon, and they would have to move out by March.

So in general, that was pretty not-cool.  Then a couple weeks ago, Maretta called me, sounding upset, because they had just learned from another tenant that their landlord had not kept the building up to fire code, had lost his right to lease, and that the building was essentially being condemned…and they would have to be moved out by December 1.

The real knife-twist on that story was that the landlord knew this information back in October but had not seen fit to inform Maretta, Kyle, or their roommates about the situation.  So they were all, er, pissed.  Maretta made a chocolate chip cheesecake to help work through the stress.

Fortunately, there are apparently quite a few options in St. Paul for four adults and four cats, and last weekend they found a nice house to move into.  Here’s the email Maretta sent me.  It made me smile!

We have a great place to live.  It is in Crocus Hill (gorgeous  part of St. Paul) a block off Grand (other end of grand than we were living before).  It is the second floor of a 4 plex house.  It has beautiful crown moldings though out.  a wood burning fireplace, a three season porch, a two car garage in back for our use, brand new kitchen appliances, and a pantry that is to die for.  I will try to have a virtual tour ready for you guys to check out on Thanksgiving.  I sure will miss seeing everyone.  Michael has agreed to come help move after, so yay!  Anyway, love and miss you.
~Maretta
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I’m so happy for them.  Sad that they’ll be moving the weekend of Thanksgiving so we won’t see them, but happy that they will have a lovely new home!
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For info on their new mailing address, you can email Maretta at marettakate@gmail.com.
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Lovely thoughts

I received a card in the mail from an organization I support called The Center for Whole Communities.

The card contained some lovely words that I thought I would share with you.

This story is about generosity, and about nourishing one another with what we have.

Honor the strength of relationships above all else
Love your place
Be willing to consider the hard questions
Listen intently
Invite those you don’t know to your table
Take the time to create something, and to appreciate beauty
Do less, with more depth and meaning
Be present with children, without distraction
Be resilient, and offer healing where you can

This story is told in many different voices and languages, and it is already happening

There are some really good reminders in there.  I hope a couple of them touch your heart.

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Autumn evening hike

Back when Andrew was in Texas, Bryan, Sylvia, and I went on a hike out on Picnic Point with Jessica, Mitch, Eli, and Celia.  It was a stunning day.  Warm, gentle, unseasonal, really!IMG_8507

Jessica and I took some pictures of our kiddos playing near (or in Sylvia’s case, in) the water.  Celia had just turned two, so there are several sweet portraits of our new two-year-old!

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So here are some snippets from our time together.  More are in the gallery!

IMG_8502 Continue reading “Autumn evening hike”

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No shoes, no coat, No Problem!

IMG_7271 My kids dislike wearing shoes.  And coats.  And for the most part, clothes.

That makes getting them out the door in cold weather a bit (ahem) of a challenge.

I’ve felt rather daunted these last weeks, envisioning the next six months of shoe and coat wearing season.  It stretches ahead of me like a dusty road of tears.

So I’m taking a new tactic.  I don’t want to battle over the little stuff, and I try to pick my battles.  So I have decided that Andrew and Sylvia get to choose if and whether they wear coats and shoes.  My hope is that by the time it really does get cold enough to be dangerous that they will both decide on their own to wear shoes and it won’t be a Mom/Child battle.

So far so good.  My kids aren’t wearing shoes and coats.  (I’m chuckling here.)  Yesterday it was raining and 45 degrees, and Andrew went out to the car barefoot with a short-sleeved shirt on.  Sylvia doesn’t like to wear shoes when we pick up Andrew from preschool, which means that she can’t walk, but she’s OK with that.  She likes her coat because she gets to pull up the hood, which is waaay cool.

My neighbors have wittnessed my barefooted kids running about while I am warm in a down coat and had.  Argh!  Whatever!!!

I’ve struggled with myself as I’ve allowed this situation to unfold.  But until frostbite is immanent, or until they get whiny about being cold, I’m going to let them be.

So to close, here’s a funny exchange between me and my smart little boy yesterday afternoon.  I was following his wet footprints as Andrew walked barefoot with no jacket in the nearly freezing weather.  I felt rather frustrated:

Me: “Andrew! You know, if you keep walking around barefoot without a jacket in this cold weather, you’re going to get sick!”

Andrew: (turns and looks at me quizzically) “No Mom!  That’s not true.  You don’t get sick from being cold.  You get sick from bad things…like germs. (pause and smile) You’re being silly, Mom. (pause and chuckle) I think you’re telling me a joke!”

Oh dear, I can’t fool my preschooler.  Education sure does make it harder to run a dictatorship.

Here’s hoping that he’s right!