Playing with Dad

Father’s Day is coming up in a couple weeks, but my kids don’t need a special day to shower their daddy with love.  In fact, if their affections were a real rain shower, he’d be soaked.

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The light was so pretty a few nights ago, we did a little photo session.  More pics are in the gallery.

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Then the kids decided to act like manic wrestlers.

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After the grunting and roaring, there was some cuteness.

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You may have noticed that it looks like Andrew has drawn all over his body with markers.  This is, in fact, what he has done.  He was apparently being Boewolf, the ancient warrior.  He informed me several times that he was mean.  This could be told by the hearts with arrows through them well as by the unhappy faces =(   that he had drawn all over his legs.  Creativity and imaginative play thrives here at the Dotzour home!

Hi! I’m back!

Dear Internet (friends and family),

I appologize for leaving you these last weeks.  You’ve been on my mind.  Occasionally, I write posts in my head about the cute things Sylvie is saying, the adorable way Andrew is being her big brother, the milestones that the kids are passing, the job changing that Bryan is going…and then I sit down and edit photos.  Because that, my friends, is what I have been doing these last weeks.  Fastly.  Furiously.  Editing.  Photos.  I finished the last of my Incredible Photography Month early last week, and then we packed up and headed for Maine for my brother Joe’s graduation from Bowdoin College.

I was up until midnight or one or two every night for weeks (except when I collapsed a few times at 8pm).  I had friends stopping in to help watch my kids so I could get a few extra hours of photo work in.  It was intense…and wonderful.  I think I feel most happy and alive and energized when I am focused and productive and a little over-worked.  It is a wonderful feeling.  Thanks to all my lovely clients who help me get that excellent high:)  And to my husband and friends for helping me meet my deadlines!

Our trip to Maine was wonderful…but that’s another post.  For now, I’ll share a few tid-bits about our life these last weeks.

We went to Wichita a couple weeks ago for Bryan’s mom’s mom’s funeral (that’s Grandma Harvey).  Sweet Grandma.  Such a lovely person she was.  Grandpa has since moved into an assisted living home with a lot of support from his kids.  Although the purpose and reason for our trip was a sad one, it sure was pleasant to see all of Bryan’s family again.  Plus we got to see cousins who we don’t see regularly.  Andrew and Sylvia really enjoyed playing with Bryan’s cousin’s children, and we had some really companionable meals and get-togethers. Photos from Wichita are in the gallery.

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Andrew had his last day of preschool at Monona Grove Nursery School.  He is so excited about going to Kindergarten in the fall, he can barely wait.  And he talks regularly about how Joe is graduating from college (“That means you’ve completed all the requirements,” he says) and he has graduated from preschool.  We (OK, maybe mostly I…Andrew’s a kid who lives in the moment) am going to miss the teachers and kids and parents.  Andrew’s years at Monona Grove Nursery School have been really special.  Luckily, Syliva will attend preschool there in a year-and-a-half!

In April, Sylvia transitioned rapidly from diapers to undies.  She’s a big girl now.  I haven’t changed a poopy diaper in months.  That, my friends, is a wonderful thing to be able to say.  4.75 years of diapers.  She was dry at night for a couple weeks, and then we had lots of accidents, so I decided it was better for me to sleep well at night than for her to be totally diaper-free.  Next step: a big girl bed.  Not sure when, but it’s coming:)

Andrew had a visitation for his new Kindergarten: Nuestro Mundo last week.  While Bryan and I learned about Kindergartner’s daily schedule, Andrew and the other soon-to-be kindergartners all went off to play with a teacher.  He came back with a picture he’d colored of a frog.  And he is SO EXCITED about his frog.  And his new school.  And coloring more frogs at his new school starting September 1.  Which, as far as he’s concerned, can’t come soon enough!

As a side note, do you know that kindergartners only get two recesses for part of the year?  Then it’s just one.  And lunch plus recess is 45 minutes.  That seems crazy.  How are kids going to learn if they’re in classrooms all day with such limited time to move and engage in free-play?  And the lunch/recess time seems like it’s setting kids up to shovel down their food as fast as possible.  Seems like a bad idea.  I liked this article on the importance placed on school lunch in France.  But other than those things, the school seems like it’s set up really nicely.  It made me a little bit stunned and frankly, ill to watch Andrew bound up the Elementary School staircase.  How did my baby become a boy?

Last week was also Eli’s 5th birthday.  We attended his birthday party and spent some time with him on his birthday morn.  Photos of our playtimes are in the gallery.  Andrew’s pretty giddy about the fact that it is now June and his own birthday is coming up!

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My sweetheart’s birthday was a couple weeks ago.  We were in Wichita for his birthday, and then when we returned home that week, we celebrated his birthday is lots of little ways.  The highlight was when we showed Bryan the hammock we’d gotten for him.  Andrew kept the secret for weeks, and Bryan was really excited.

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05-22-10_wichita_010 Bryan’s last day of work at OpGen was last Wednesday.  Thanks to all his co-workers for giving him a great send-off:)  He’s home with us all the rest of the week, and then he starts his new job on Monday, June 7.

I took lots of photos during our trip to Maine.  Stay tuned!

~Althea

Chasing UFOs

A few weeks ago, we spent a Saturday morning at Terry’s place while Bryan was participating in a chess tournament.  Terry was recently home from a long vacation, and one of the toys he brought home was a flying UFO.  He flew it around his condo, and the kids loved it!

Here’s some pics of my kids being goofs and having fun.

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I just love these next two!!

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IMG_4041My new favorite picture of my girl.

IMG_4033This soft bunny is a puppet that Terry got at a store in St. Paul a couple years ago.  It’s such a cute toy, and Sylvia carried it around under her arm.  Such sweetness:)

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Sibling love

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Andrew and Sylvia are so cute together these days!  They are playing well for increasing periods of time…maybe 20 minutes before needing intervention:)

Here’s some happy kids and their toes.

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Now what’s going on here?  Sylvia, do you think that’s a good idea?

IMG_3861Fortunately, you’ve got a sweetie sweet brother:)

IMG_3869She loves him…up to the moon.

IMG_3874And he loves her right back.

IMG_3873Sylvia is highly influenced by the fashion sense of those around her.  If, for example, her dolly is naked, she might decide that she must be naked as well.  If a friend has taken off their socks, if Andrew’s shirt got wet and he took it off…you got it…she’s going to follow suit.  Many a day, she has been digging through her brother’s dresser to find her clothes for the day.  Seems that she fits 4T clothes alright!

IMG_3934And Andrew is more than happy to have a devotee!  Especially when they both are wearing big boy jammies, they’re so cute!

IMG_3938I sure do love my kids.  And little compares to the happiness I feel in my heart when they are interacting sweetly together.

Doll play

My little girl loves playing with dolls.  She nearly always has either a doll or a purse, and in the last couple months, she’s spent vast amounts of time tending to the needs of her little charges.  She puts them to sleep, gives them bottles, changes their dirty diapers, and hauls them around under her arm.  When I come upon her talking quietly to her dolls, she looks up at me shyly and it’s clear that I was interrupting some personal time!

Here’s Sylvia putting a dolly (Tiny Dolly) to bed in the wooden cradle that used to be mine.

IMG_3841Checking to make sure her little one is comfy.

IMG_3837“Oh, there’s Mom with her camera again.”

IMG_3838Cheesy grin.

IMG_3839I like this out-of-focus look at my little girl as she’s feeling tender and quiet.

IMG_3883Another morning, and another room for the crib (it gets pulled all over the house these days).  I love this photo of Sylv.

IMG_3898Reading to her dolly.

IMG_3904Picking up Tiny Dolly for some snuggle time.

IMG_3908Giving Tiny Dolly some nutritious juice.

IMG_3907Oops. How did this one get in there?  Sylvia likes to dress up just like Mommy.

IMG_3923‘Tis the season to care for dollies.   If you like playing dolls and having had the opportunity for quite some time, have I got the girl for you!

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Playing house

Alivia and Rayna just came over, and amidst the squeals of excitement and announcements…

Sylvia: (pointing outdoors at her swing that we hung out on the tree yesterday) “My swing!  Rayna, my swing!”
Rayna: (pointing at her dad who was walking past the swing) “My daddy, Sylvia.  Dat’s my daddy.”

Coats and backpacks were removed.  The big kids turned to the little ones and said, “Let’s play house!”
“House!!  House!!!” shouted the little girls.
“You can be the babies,” announced the big kids.
“Babies, BABIES!” delighted the little girls.

Four kids traipsed in a line out of the living room and back into the sun room where I imagine they’ll amuse themselves (with only minor problems) at playing house.

This has become a somewhat ritualized game here at our house this month.  As you might expect, Alivia is the mom (the little girls are often heard calling out, “Mama!  Mama!!”…but not for me!).  Andrew’s the dad.  And Sylvia and Rayna are the babies.

They remove all the cushions from the love seat and sofa and build a fort in the sun room.  Alivia just said, “Andrew, can you please keep the babies occupied while I make the house?”

Despite the fact that the “parents” give a lot of directions (orders), the “babies” seem to enjoy the game immensely.  My rules are: 1) Safety first and 2) Everyone needs to stay happy.  Other than that, this “house play” has given me some fabulous time to, say write a blog post while the kids are happy and engaged and active.

Plus, I get to marvel at the fact that Sylvia is able to happily play without my intervention for long stretches of time.  Thank you, Alivia!

Registered for kindergarten

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On Monday afternoon, I registered my big little boy for kindergarten.  My plan was to take him with me so we could register together, but as we started walking across the street from his preschool to the Frank Allis elementary, I turned around and saw that his face had crumpled and he was teary.  “I don’t want to go to kindergarten,” he implored.  “I just want to stay at preschool.”  Well, my boy, I couldn’t agree with you more.

We talked a little about how sometimes new things can make a person feel nervous.  And then we decided that I would just go register him by myself later in the afternoon.

Jessica came over to watch my kiddos, and I walked, for the second time, through the doors of the Frank Allis elementary school.  I’ll admit that I felt nauseated.  And I’m excited about kindergarten.  There’s just something about this whole registration thing that is getting me in my gut.  I feel happy, excited, and ready to run for the bathroom.  Seems like many moms of soon-to-be-kindergartners are in the same boat:)

I filled out 8,269 forms, set up a screening appointment for Andrew, and learned out about two open houses in May and August.  Then I stepped into a separate room and met with the principal of Nuestro Mundo.  A couple weeks back, I wrote about how we were trying to decide if Nuestro Mundo would be a good fit for our guy.  As I’ve thought and read about it more, I got really excited about the dual language opportunity, and so I filled out the paperwork and signed our boy up.  There will be a lottery next month to determine who gets into the program.  They are accepting 45 students.  And so, in addition to my nervous tummy, I’m also going to be trying hard not to think or worry too much about the outcome of the lottery.  We are supposed to find out in late April.  And I’ll let you know!

I’m hoping that Andrew feels some excitement or at least not trepidation as we plan to attend the “play with a  cool teacher for a while” (aka kindergarten screening) next Tuesday:)  Maybe he and I should get some ice cream afterward to sweeten the deal!

And, as I reminded Andrew yesterday while I knelt next to him in an ernest coversation on the snowy sidewalk between his preschool and elementary school, we still have one, two, three more months of preschool and then one, two, three whole months of summer until school starts in the fall.  And by that time, I imagine that both he and I will be much more ready:)

Kindergarten options

This is the post I meant to write when I wrote about my little boy growing up.  Now that I’ve had a moment to sigh and reflect and then to record all the dates for the 2010-11 school year in my calendar, I’m feeling a little more onboard with the whole “going to kindergarten” thing.

Our elementary school is just around the corner from our house.  I love the idea of walking to school.  I sure have loved walking (or biking or sledding) Andrew to Monona Grove Nursery School, which is just across the street from his elementary school.  It feels so neighborly and sweet to be right close by.

The Frank Allis school houses (in apparently very crowded conditions) two separate schools.  The first is the normal Allis Elementary School.  There’s a nice little write-up about that school on their website.  Looks like it’s been a school for 92 years!  The second is a dual language charter school called Nuestro Mundo (click here for more info on their program).

On Monday night, I hurried through the falling light to attend an informational session on Nuestro Mundo.  As I crossed the street toward the school, I stopped for a moment to snap the photo above on my phone.  I’ve never been in this school before, and it struck me that after I walked through the doors, it would never be “new” again.  At some point, it will probably be so homey and familiar that I won’t even remember what it felt like when this building was new and foreign and a little bit scary.

The informational session was held in a third grade classroom, and the room was packed.  It seemed to be about half English speakers and half Spanish speakers.  The teacher who led the session addressed the room in Spanish and was then translated by another teacher.  Questions were answered in both languages.  Apparently, for future meetings (and PTO meetings and things like that) the presentations are done in Spanish, and English speakers wear a headset where they can hear simultaneous translations so the meetings go a little faster.

Nuestro Mundo is a charter school, and they enroll about 50% Spanish speaking kids and 50% English speaking kids.  (See here for an article written about the school by my friend Samara.)  In kindergarten, the instruction is 90% in Spanish, and it shifts about 10% a year until by third grade, instruction is half English, half Spanish.  Children are taught literacy first in Spanish and then, after they are proficient readers, in English.

There is a lottery for enrollment in the school, and it sounds like about half of the students who want to get in actually make it.  So in a way, I don’t want to get too caught up in wanting this program, because who knows if we’ll get in.

Here are some of my thoughts as I approach the idea of picking the right school for Andrew:

  1. I want Andrew to love school.  I’d like him to be happy at school, to connect to his teacher, to smile with his classmates, to feel comfortable and confident and secure.  I’d like him to skip on his way to school.  And even if he never will tell me one little bit about his day, I’d like to know in my heart that it was a good one, full of nice friends, compassionate teachers, and fun activities.
  2. Wherever her goes, I wouldn’t be surprised if it takes my young boy a little while to warm up.  Andrew seems to be an observer by nature.  I notice that in group settings, he often waits on the sidelines and checks things out until he feels comfortable enough to jump in.  That said, he has a great time in his own little sidelines, and he’s usually very content to play games or read or do art on his own until he’s ready to engage with others.  At least in preschool, Andrew seems to be a kid who plays well with everyone but who doesn’t have a couple special friends.  Whenever I ask him about his friends, he’ll rattle off the names of several kids, and if I try to suss out who he most enjoys spending time with, he smiles and throws up his hands, “I like all my friends at school, Mom!”
  3. Academically, I think that Andrew is pretty advanced right now.  Due to his focused, cognitive nature, he’s been fascinated with letters and reading for the last year.  If he’s in the mood, he can now read almost any picture book he picks up.  I love it when he reads to Sylvia!  His writing is somewhat legible, and he really enjoys writing “journals” and books.  At the suggestion of his preschool teacher, I’ve made a little dictionary for him with all the words that he’s asked me to spell for him.  It’s one of his favorite possessions.  Andrew is also really interested in numbers and math, and he often asks me to quiz him with “a tricky one” about addition or subtraction.  He loves telling the temperature, and we’ve been having fun this winter with negative numbers:)
    Because of all this, I think that the academic content of a traditional kindergarten will be much less important than the social and enrichment aspects of going to school.  In the dual immersion language program, it looks like kids score lower on academic achievement testing for several years (actually until 6th grade at which point they score better than traditional classrooms).  I’m guessing that this is because the kids are working on language skills in addition to everything else.  If Andrew goes to the dual immersion language program, his early literacy and math skills might not lag as much as they do for kids since he’s starting out with many early skills, and that makes me feel a little better, because to tell the truth, I have a bit of a hard time signing up for a program that could from some perspectives leave Andrew at an academic disadvantage.
  4. The things that I love, love, love about Nuestro Mundo is that it could give Andrew something that Bryan and I can’t give him…fluency in a second language.  Even more than that, though, the school is designed to help students become global citizens.  I love the idea of Andrew gaining a multicultural education (actually, this is true in either school).  I love the idea of a school where he learns at such an early age about how to dive in and learn a new language, a new culture.
    Before I had kids, I remember thinking that I really wanted to expose them to a wide variety of people and cultures and situations.  I had hoped to spend time in parts of town or in parts of the world that are very different from ours so that we could, together, build familiarity with that which initially feels foreign.  We haven’t really done this at all, and so maybe this is a great way to start!
  5. A couple weeks ago, I read an article in my alumni magazine, The Carleton Voice about Carleton’s growing international program.  I thought the lesson applied strongly to our kindergarten choice:

About three years ago, stormy weather stranded Carleton President Robert Oden Jr. in the Detroit airport. Although his 37-hour delay was both regrettable and forgettable, he came across a magazine article that wasn’t. On the subject of global leadership, the writer had interviewed more than 20 leaders in business, industry, the arts, and government from around the world.

“When they were asked how future leaders should be educated, their answers were remarkably similar,” recalls President Oden. “Almost all of them said something like: ‘Become fluent in at least two, preferably three languages—and spend as much time as you possibly can with people from other countries.’ ” A number of the leaders went on to describe the importance of developing the knowledge, understanding, and skills required to effectively communicate and negotiate with people from anywhere in the world.”

Fine!  I thought, I’ll be brave!  I’ll sign Andrew up for a program in which he’ll be jumping into 90% Spanish.  The teachers seem terrific, and they’ll help him along.  Andrew seems to talk in gibberish half the time, and he eats up the Spanish words that I share with him, so picking up a new language should come pretty easy to him.

Ahh, I don’t know.  I find myself really leaning toward Nuestro Mundo, but I’m wondering…what are your thoughts?

FYI, here’s the school data profile for the Frank Allis Elementary School and here’s the school data profile on Nuestro Mundo.

Growing up…registering for kindergarten

Can you believe that my little baby boy is going to be a kindergartner this fall?

It’s true.

Four and a half years ago, he looked like this.  He was a tiny newborn who didn’t even know how to nurse.  He was about to open his blue eyes to see the sunlight of a new day for the very first time.  I slept with him curled right next to me because being apart from his little self made me feel like I was missing a limb or an organ.

He had grown in my womb, and through his birth, I became a mother and he became a child of the world.

Then he started growing up.  Not being a newborn.

He can clap when we ask him He started walking and running and then talking too.

As he’s grown, Andrew has consistently shown his lovely self.  He’s solid.  And smart.  And imaginative.  And determined.  And reserved.  And mellow.  Except when he’s crazy.  He takes his time to warm up, and when he does, his smile shines like the sun.

Boy is a bit cold from swimming!

He’s made friends.  Good friends.  Who help him grow and adjust and delight in the world in new and wonderful ways.

Alivia and Andrew walkin' in the fall

Favorite photo!!

He’s gone from being a baby to becoming a big brother.  And in that moment, he suddenly became so big, so grown up.

So much love! Andrew has loved going to preschool at Monona Grove Nursery School.  I love the small size of his school, the wonderful teachers, the relaxed, play-based, non-academic atmosphere.  It’s such a gentle first school experience.  Plus, the other children and their parents are so much fun.

Here's Andrew with his teachers Sending him to preschool two mornings a week last year and three mornings a week this year has been a wonderful addition to our days.

I recently learned that I need to register Andrew for kindergarten (I’ve also recently learned that I don’t know how to spell kindergarten).   March 1.  aaaaaak!  Sorry, I’m better.  I’m really excited about Andrew going to kindergarten.  But.  yeah.  It feels like a big step.  It feels like moving from the known and familiar to the unknown.  He’ll be away from me for seven hours a day, five days a week.  He’ll be going to school in a big building that has always looked to me more like a high school than an elementary school.  And I think he’ll be fine.  I’ll just need a little time to adjust.  Here, in the comfort of the interwebs, I will adjust.

It’s an odd thing, learning to let go.  When our babes are tiny, it feels like we can control every aspect of their existence.  We choose their toys and their clothes and the songs they listen to and the people they interact with.  We can ensure that they only eat exactly the kinds of foods we want them to have in their precious little bodies.  Then, slowly, that shifts.  If we’re smart, we let other people take care of them, give our children the opportunity to experience life solo with relatives and friends or babysitters.  Then, suddenly, they have experiences that are apart from us.  They know songs or books or games that we’ve never heard of.  And it’s wonderful, and it feels a little odd.

So this kindergarten thing is just a part of that whole letting go continuum.  It’s symbolic of starting in the long school process that will culminate in high school graduation.  It’s going to mean a big change in the way our days are structured and in the way we spend time together.  And it’s going to mean that most of Andrew’s waking hours will be spent in the company of people I don’t currently know anything about, but I’m sure they’ll be lovely.   Ahh, big changes.

Oh, a new favorite picture of my boy!

By the time September rolls around, I think that my independent, brave little guy…who will then be five years old…will be all ready.  Hopefully, I will be too!